Sunday, January 18, 2015

Missing: Young Males

Madame:

I have the same sickness.  Then when I finish a whole bunch all at once, it makes people think I’m a fast reader when just the opposite is the case. :)

We had an overemphasis on elites during the Revolutionary period.  It explains much about the capsule items. 

Treated self to some needed comedy relief last night:  “The Wedding Ringer.”  It was funny and entertaining, even farcical.  While its premise is undoubtedly overblown, like many things, it holds at its core a kernel of truth—that fewer of us, and especially fewer young males, have close friends.  In fact, researchers tell us, the reduction in close friends for the general population is by at least a third, let alone the drop for young males. 

Young Western males, and young American males in particular, seem on average to not be heading in a preferred direction.  For example, the percentage of young females disappointed with close age male prospects appear to be rising, according to social researchers.  While this might be of some deflective benefit to older males, sociologically it’s not a good trend.  While we can all think of numerous exceptions to the trend, exceptions only illustrate trends, they do not circumvent them. 

Many factors seem to be involved.  Among them, for a great number of males:
1.     Delayed maturity.  For many reasons, some of them interfacing, the average attainment age of male mental and emotional maturity as measured by social researchers continues to go up.  It’s far more than the proverbial “male living in his parents’ basement playing video games” image (albeit, which is true enough in a great number of cases).
2.     Social awkwardness.  Far more than the traditional shyness of many males, the disconnectedness of American society has contributed to social inexperience in a sort of downward spiral.
3.     Reduced testosterone (act less masculine; less drive to connect with females,etc.).  The decline in American male testosterone has been well documented.   The second and third order effects have not.
4.     Video games.  The number of young males who say they would rather play video games than attempt to socialize with females has risen sharply.  This is so even as the number of female gamers has risen significantly.  Even older males have become Neil Postman’s examples:  “Up until 5 playing.” “Up until 7 playing, and had to be at work at 8.”
5.     Diminished economic prospects.  The poor economy for aspiring middle class males, let alone working class males, helps to contribute to both diminished self-assessment by the males, and diminished interest by the females.  That college graduates have been particularly hard hit has only accentuated the problem.  The real prospects, and especially the exciting ones, have gone away for far too many young men.
6.     Poorer physical fitness.  It tends to magnify the other trends, contributing to reduced attraction, poorer self image, diminished energy, etc.
7.     Diminished attraction of, and diminished prospects for, marriage.  In 2007, for example, only 40% of the men in the prime wedding age group were wed.
8.     How men in general and fathers in particular now are the butt of too many jokes, and too poor or even demeaning an image in our popular culture. While I am by no means letting young men off the hook here (and even their same age icons often contribute to the image), it’s simply the case that too often today’s males are living up to the low expectations the culture has for them.

There are surely more, but these are all I could find (please list any additional factors that come to mind).  And I am particularly interested in your view on all this, Madame, including what might be done.

And I realize there are many problems and many things to talk about, but last night prompted this one! :)

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